Even if your partner claims he/she has been tested and is clear of all sexually transmitted diseases, the results of a test can change with the person’s next partner. One of the first questions you ask should pertain to STDs. And if you don’t trust your answer, do a little online research.” 3. “Most people assume that they’re sleeping with someone who’s single, because they are, too,” says April Masini, New York-based author of four relationship advice books and the AskApril advice column. Are you married?įor obvious reason, you’ll want to know if you’re unknowingly agreeing to make yourself an accomplice in the ultimate act of betrayal. More: 13 Sexy gifts for your significant other that aren’t lingerie 2. “You don’t have to engage in a long, drawn-out discussion to gauge how your partner feels and you can simply open the conversation by expressing your needs/desires.” “Many people make the mistake of acting first and discussing later, but because sexual values are highly variant (some see sex as a simple physical act and others value it as a means of connecting intimately) and deeply entrenched (we often assume others feel the same as we do) this can lead to confusion, conflict and hurt feelings,” Dr. Save yourself heartache by knowing beforehand what your partner’s relationship plans are, says Astroglide’s Resident Sexologist Dr. Are you looking for a casual hookup or are you hoping that sex will lead to something more long term? Here are nine questions experts say are important to ask prior to sex. Yet, all of the pain we experience is due to not knowing the type of experience we’ll have, nor knowing the man’s mindset and dating goals.” Why blow the glow? We fear we’ll come across as difficult, needy, or intrusive. In fearing our prospective partner may feel uncomfortable with being asked questions, women have learned to not ask at all. In today’s world of open sexuality, sex comes first and questions come after the fact. “Culturally, we’ve come to a time period being mute. “Most women fail to ask any sort of questions before sex,” says bestselling author and relationship expert Susan Winter. More: A startling number of men have never been tested for STDs Since sex can mean very different things to different people, it’s important to ask the right questions before doing it - it’s even more important to feel like you can ask any question you deem necessary. Maybe he has zero intention of sleeping with only one person until he’s married, while you’d never dream of playing the field while you have working knowledge of every detail of another human’s naked body (again, or vice versa). You may find out, weeks later, that your attitudes about sex differ greatly - perhaps he views it as a pleasant escape from reality, while you deemed it a heartfelt spiritual connection and the start of a serious relationship (or vice versa).
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